its not THAT long, so please read and help me?...
im on the diving team, and i feel like i am bad at it. i am not that kind of mopey person that mopes and complains about sucking at the sport, but i have tried my hardest, and still cant do much.
if i quit, i feel like like a part of my life will be gone, but if i stay, my life will be dangerous. cuz even the coach says the way i dive isnt safe and i could get hurt. hmm... wen im at practice, lately, its been making me very sad (especially the slapping, and pain) and i feel so sure that i should quit, but wen im not at practice, i feel like i should stay, and it wasnt that bad.
i do like it, its the dangerosity and all the pressure u get from having to learn a number of dives really fast that scares me. and hitting the board. i havent been in competition yet, so that means i can still refund the school suit wich is like $60 and im not rich, so that would be good.
the coach said he'll put me in a harness thing to do the scary dive, so that mite not be so bad. b4, he made me do them myself. mayb this is all pms, but i kno it will get harder, and mayb i should quit, but i'll really miss it. and some ppl kno im on the team and they'll be all wat the hell? but i dont wanna suck in front of ppl i kno. and i'll feel really uncomfortable quitting, im the kind of person that is shy to speak their mind and say "no, i dont wanna do this anymore." and wen i do a good dive and get praise, i feel happy. so mayb i feel #####ty cuz i've been doing hard dives and failing?
i feel so trapped between wanting to do it, and and not wanting to do it... sigh* advice please?