Dear Diary,I quit shaking my foot all summer. And now I'm suddenly starting to shake it again and I am trying to stop but at times I feel as if I need to. Is it because of cold weather coming around again?
I can't stop sleeping on my stomach, and this has screwed up an entire half of my body for many many years. My x-rays show a very crooked spine, and one hip bone is at a completely different height than the other. This is very uncomfortable. One half of my body is higher, except from the torso down it is the opposite. I don't know. I don't understand why the doctor never gave me a brace, she just keeps telling me to sit up straight. I try but it is very hard to function because one shoulder blade feels much closer to the middle of my back than the other. I can feel all of this 24/7 inside my body. I also crack my neck and back non-stop. Every time I go to the doctor, I end up crying all the way from there and on the subway ride back home, it makes me cry so much when she sends me home without a brace. This is so hard. I am constantly uncomfortable and in pain. She must be right because she is the doctor,
but I keep on sleeping on my stomach and ruining my body more and more. I have tried every night to sleep on my back, but I cannot sleep on my back or side unless I am in the crooked position that my back is in. If I try to sleep on my back straight like a normal person, I end up not sleeping for 3 hours, just lying on my back trying to keep my eyes closed. My eyes don't even stay closed when I sleep on my back, no matter how tired I am. I cannot shut them tight. One side of my face feels higher than the other, and the eye on the higher side is the only one that can close. To keep the other one closed, I have to sleep on my stomach with that eye that won't close dug into the pillow so it is forced to close and the other eye just closes normally without being dug into the pillow.
