April 16, 2010

My name is Justin, I'm on anti-depressants, and this is my story.
I've recently moved to a new place. Getting used to a new city,
Leaving behind friends, meeting new people, and trying to get along with
new family members. It can really have a big affect especially if your trying
to cope with your past. This sudden move is overwhelming, It's like I'm
melting in a furnace, begging for someone to make me into a beautiful
glass sculpture.
A month before i moved I try to commit suicide.
I ended up in a psychiatric ward in Los Angelos. The people were nice but
strict, I liked it there, they listen and helped me. After a week they
prescribed me medication and let me go, I was on the pills for a month, I
know they worked. I was laughing a lot and before I knew it, I was even
smiling more, I was happy, but my mother believes it was all in my head
and that I didn't need them. I know I'm still a child but I'm very mature.
My mother and I bud heads a lot. When I'm around her, all we do is bicker
and when we aren't fighting, there's just tension in the air. I'm in a cocoon,
just wrapped in a thick silk of lies, waiting and wanting to spread my
whimsical wings and fly, I feel like I could vanish and disappear into thin air
and no one would even know. I'm the child who was made out of class. The
boy with the stone heart. Turning into stone when he doesn't want to get
hurt. A weirdo because he doesn't like to talk to anyone, afraid that the boy
inside him might scream something out he's been hiding for a long time.
I'm confident and loyal, nice but afraid, handsome and ugly, broken and
beautiful. The black bird with broken wings who try to fly away.